good grief?

Instead of offering you chocolates this Easter I’m instead gifting you a few choice words & some ideas that I hope will satiate your desires for longer than anything you can buy from Hotel Chocolat!

I generally aim to post every Monday morning but as it’s a bank holiday this Monday I thought I’d treat you to an early communication.

I’ll try to keep this post pithy.

Your time is valuable.

The core themes today are of the nature of sorrow, grief but also joy.

Sounds a bit morbid?

Maybe.

But I hope my approach will leave you a little more uplifted than you feel right now.

If you find any value in any of my missives please do encourage your contacts - friends, family, colleagues & random folk in the street - to join our weekly emailing list.

In order to bring a buddi bench™ to your local park soon I need your help to build awareness of this project.

My goal is to be able to have a buddi bench™ in any park in the UK that wants one.

This will only happen if there is a ground-swell of support from you all.

Sharing is caring!

Enough of the self-promotion & now back to the topics for this post.

I’m going to consider two beautiful poems.

One by William Blake & one by Kahlil Gibran.

Both poems are profound in their simplicity.

William Blake’s poem first:

‘Joy & woe are woven fine,

A clothing for the soul divine,

Under every grief & pine,

Runs a joy with silken twine.

It is right it should be so,

We were made for joy and woe,

And when this we rightly know,

Through the world we safely go.’

~ William Blake

This stanza is from the longer poem 'Auguries of Innocence' by William & it speaks to the interconnectedness of joy & sorrow in the human experience.

This poem was given to me by a dear friend of mine, Sarah W., who sadly died in the prime of her life from cancer. Sarah was a soul-buddy & deeply loved by me & many others. Not only did Sarah lead an inspiring life of creativity, Sarah also helped thousands of people recover from emotional distress. Aware of her inevitable demise from cancer Sarah not only lived passionately but also died well - determined to make the most of each remaining day. Too soon to die, but left behind a brilliant legacy & light to help me & those that loved her to navigate the sadness of her premature death. This poem was a gift to help me grieve, in a healthy way, not just for Sarah but for all those I have lost previously & will lose before it is my time to die.

Sarah was a huge fan of William Blake (1757-1827) who was an English poet, artist, & printmaker. He is considered one of the most important figures in the Romantic era of English literature. Blake is known for his highly imaginative & visionary works, which often combined his poetry with his original artworks.

Blake was born in London, UK & spent most of his life there. He was trained as an engraver & worked as a commercial engraver & illustrator, producing book illustrations & other commissioned works. However, his true passion was for his own creative work, which he produced independently throughout his life.

Blake's poetry often explored themes of spirituality, imagination, & the human condition. He was deeply influenced by religious mysticism & had a complex & idiosyncratic understanding of Christian theology. His artwork often featured vivid, mystical imagery & intricate designs.

William Blake is known to have had several mystical experiences throughout his life, including seeing visions of angels & other divine beings. One of these experiences reportedly occurred in Peckham, south-east London, in the year 1765 when he was just eight years old.

According to Blake's own account, he was walking through a field in Peckham when he saw a tree filled with angels. He described the angels as 'brighter than the sun,' & they spoke to him & blessed him with a kiss. This experience had a profound impact on Blake & played a significant role in shaping his worldview & his artistic vision. In his artwork & poetry, Blake often incorporated images of angels, spirits, & otherworldly beings, reflecting his belief in a world beyond the physical realm.

While some may be skeptical of Blake's accounts of mystical experiences, it is important to note that such experiences are not uncommon throughout human history & many people of different faiths & cultures have reported similar encounters with the divine. Blake was deeply spiritual & believed that the imagination was a powerful tool for accessing the divine realm. He saw his visions & mystical experiences as a way of connecting with God & gaining insight into the nature of reality.

Let’s examine Blake’s poem a little more closely.

The first line, 'Joy & woe are woven fine,' suggests that joy & sorrow are intertwined & cannot be separated. They are not distinct emotions, but rather part of a single fabric that makes up the 'clothing for the soul divine.' This line suggests that our experiences of both joy & sorrow contribute to our spiritual growth & development.

The second line, 'Under every grief & pine, runs a joy with silken twine,' offers a more hopeful perspective on sorrow. It suggests that even in the midst of grief & suffering, there is a thread of joy that runs through it. This joy may be harder to see or feel in difficult times, but it is always there.

The third line, 'It is right it should be so,' acknowledges that joy & sorrow are both necessary parts of the human experience. We cannot have one without the other & it is natural & right that we should experience both.

The fourth line, 'We were made for joy and woe,' reinforces this idea that joy & sorrow are integral to our human nature. It suggests that our capacity to experience both joy & sorrow is part of what makes us human.

The final line, '& when this we rightly know, through the world we safely go,' suggests that accepting the interplay of joy & sorrow can bring us a sense of security & peace. When we understand that both joy & sorrow are necessary parts of our journey, we are better equipped to navigate the challenges & uncertainties of life.

Another beautiful poem with a similar message of hope can be found in Kahlil Gibran’s book 'The Prophet,’. Kahlil suggests joy & sorrow are two sides of the same coin. He says that they are inseparable & that we cannot experience one without also experiencing the other.

As someone with Bipolar this idea resonates strongly with my experience of facing struggles. Yes my sorrow can lay me low, sometimes very low, but my distress can also be the crucible for creativity & a passion for simply being alive.

In Kahlil’s book, a character named Almustafa is asked about joy & sorrow & he responds with the following:

'Your joy is your sorrow unmasked.

And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears.

And how else can it be?

The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.

Is not the cup that holds your wine the very cup that was burned in the potter's oven?

And is not the lute that soothes your spirit, the very wood that was hollowed with knives?

When you are joyous, look deep into your heart & you shall find it is only that which has given you sorrow that is giving you joy.

When you are sorrowful, look again in your heart & you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.’

Gibran's message is that joy & sorrow are not opposites but rather two parts of the same experience. Without sorrow, we cannot truly appreciate joy, & without joy, we cannot find the strength to endure sorrow. He suggests that we should embrace both joy & sorrow as necessary parts of the human experience & allow them to shape & enrich our lives.

Both poems offer a reflection on the inevitability of both joy & sorrow in the human experience, & the importance of accepting & embracing both as necessary parts of our spiritual growth & development.

As someone wiser than me once said:

‘Suffering is inevitable, misery is optional.’

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